Stick Horse Cowgirls

in·teg·ri·ty /ɪnˈtɛgrɪti/  1.adherence to moral and ethical principles; soundness of moral character; honesty. 2. the state of being whole, entire, or undiminished: to preserve the integrity of the empire.  3.a sound, unimpaired, or perfect condition Do you ever have epiphanies of basic, simple concepts?  I’d like to say that I have flashes of genius in areas yet unexplored and undefined.  But, no, my “flashes” lead me to exclaim, “ Eureka! Look what I’ve discovered!  The sky really is blue!” Only to see others shrug their shoulders and say, “Yeah, what else is new?”  I had one of these flashes recently on the definition of “integrity.”  I have a wonderful long-time friend who is so supportive of me.  And, yet, I found out that he is also supportive of my husband.  You know, the husband who has stolen money from my mother, who has abandoned his entire family, and who has left me with a butt-load of debt?  Yeah, that one. I foun...

Yes, I’m on a Mel Gibson roll, here.  This is the third post in a row which has sprung from his shenanigans (see these links for the first and second ).  I have a bully pulpit, here, and I’m fairly elbowing V out of the way to write my thoughts.  Al Gore did me such a favor by inventing this internet thing… There is so much that this episode has stirred up in me.  I think that one benefit of celebrity for us “nobodies”  is that famous people can play out their dramas in public and portray life in a magnified way so that sometimes we can pick through the drama and learn something. Mel’s girlfriend, Oksana is in a pickle, isn’t she?  She’s saddled with an aging, crumbling man (because when you have a child with someone, you are saddled with them) and she’s saddled her little daughter with one, too. While I am on Oksana’s team when it comes to exposing and resisting domestic violence, I cannot help but point out her own complicity in getting herself i...

I had an uplifting encounter today that made me think about episodes in our lives that prove to be formative.  I had an appointment with a man who is a witness in a case.  We were preparing him for the questions I will be asking him next month when he takes the stand. Now let me say first that outside of close relatives, most folks hate the thought of being a witness in a lawsuit.  They really don’t want to be involved in things that are “other people’s business.”  I hear this all the time, and usually make do with a telephone conversation to determine what the witness might say on the stand, often followed by a subpoena which is, in essence, enforced attendance at trial. I understand that appearing in court is nerve-wracking for all except us lawyers who do the grilling, and I suppose that is part of the reluctance.  But what concerns me many times is the apathy shown by third parties who could contribute much to the Court’s understanding and to a good...

You know, I’ve traveled a good bet.  I’ve been to all “corners” of our great country and a whole lot in between.  (and, yes, overseas, too, but I’m talkin’ America here)  I have loved every blessed minute of my American travels.  I revel in our country.  I think there is just something “American” about Americans, whatever section of the country you look at.  There is a spirit that defines us and even  transcends national origin.  And “spirit’ is just the only word I can think of.  It embodies pioneering and innovation and, yes, brashness that others may find off-putting, but which we know that it is just that old American Spirit.  It is necessary for our accomplishments and endearing to those of us who live here. I hope all people feel the same way about their nations, and I assume this feeling of loyalty and exuberant love of home are natural. Sorry, I’m spinning out of control. I tend toward old-fashioned  patriotism. ...

Recently I had a family in my office, gathered around my young-father client who was experiencing marital difficulties.  This son of the family was going through a divorce he did not want, and his parents were present because they are loving, involved grandparents.  Sometimes I see parents of my grown clients who are really running the show behind scenes; and I have to separate them, visiting with my client alone, guiding him or her notwithstanding the parents’ inappropriate input.  But I did not sense that situation here.  No, these were sane, rati onal grandparents who were present because the breakup of their son’s marriage was a family tragedy, and there are young children involved.  These grandparents were focused on the children; they were not bashing the young wife who was intent on leaving; they were not jockeying for financial position.  They were worried, sincerely, about the kids.  They were saying things like, “ We wish she would go t...

For ten years now my cellular phone service has been with one of the giants of the industry. I won't mention the name, but its initials are: A T & T, and its logo is: I am not technologically savvy—don’t want to be. I’m not up to snuff on all the doo-hickeys that are on my fancy phone. I mainly just want the blamed thing to work as a phone, give me my email and just let me go about my business. I don’t shop around for the best plans, although I am vaguely aware that I am “under contract,” which I don’t think is quite as beneficial to me as when the term was applied to, say, Elizabeth Taylor. Still, I’ve been pretty satisfied with my service. Until the first crack in my relationship with AT&T about six months ago. I'm writing now because it happened again...let me share... My cell account is a “small business” account. I have had two numbers on it, one of which is used by my eighty-one-year-old mother. Ten years ago, she would not have had a cell phone (to use her phra...