C: Little Spindly Legs—Eight of Them

I know that the book of Genesis has dubbed the serpent/snake as our “anathema,” but for me it’s always been spiders. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not about to load up on boa constrictors as pets or anything, but snakes do not send me into screaming meemies, just respectful avoidance. Spiders, on the other hand, just freak me completely out. Really, it makes no sense…look how much bigger I am, and not one spider has ever actually hurt anyone I know. What gives on this? But, as much as I dread them, I cannot bear the thought of stomping on them. Basically, I just choose to give them the right-of-way.

Last Sunday I was sitting in church when I had a spider moment. The church has concrete floors scored into sections. They are a rich brown color, smooth as glass and shiny. I was sitting there on the aisle during the sermon (yes, I was listening, I swear!), when my spider radar went off. My eyes shifted to the aisle floor, where a small spider (less than dime size) was making his way toward me. Yes, directly toward me!

He was about three feet away. My mother-in-law, sitting beside me, noticed my focus on something other than the preacher. She spied the spider and leaned over. “Put your foot over and squash it,” she said. This is something I could not do. I scooted my feet to try to change his course. It worked, and he began traveling toward my purse! I could NOT have him taking refuge there (the horrors of that began to swirl in my mind). I reached over and grabbed my purse off the floor.

He changed course once again and began to move away from me out in the aisle. As I watched him wander up the aisle, I thought about how small he was. Why, I was a giant next to him! What, on earth, was I doing, shrinking from someone so much smaller than me? And why would I want to kill him, anyway? He was not bothering me…I mean to say, he was bothering me, but he did not intend to bother me.

And, of course, my mind moved on to other inane things: How conscious of us was he? Was he frightened, or did he not realize the danger he was fixing to be in as we paraded down that aisle to receive communion? And, furthermore, what was God’s view of this creature? And should we even contemplate taking a life in God’s house? Isn’t God all about life????

Oh, my mind was racing. Just as it reached a philosophical crescendo, the guy in front of me noticed the little spider and reached his foot out. Squish!! He was gone. Not so much as a smear remain (probably all on the guy's shoe). Really, I was rather stunned. After mentally waxing eloquent in my mind about this spider, this all seemed rather brutal and unnecessary.

I still don’t really want to cozy up to spiders, mind you. But by the end of the service, I had moved my perception of spiders from something like this frighening image:


To this (having worked myself up into empathy for the spider):



And I realize that neither perception is particularly realistic. And I realize, too, that my next encounter with one will likely repeat the same insane fright response as always...some things never change.

Y'all reckon I overthink things??? C