A week ago Tuesday, I flew to meet my mother-in-law (1100 miles away) to drive her here. We were two nights on the road (more about that in a later post).
MIL was here three days with me awaiting furniture, and my sister (who lives near) sold her house and moved in with me, along with her husband, three kids and three dogs (her fourth and eldest child went to my brother's house).
So, for nine days now there have been eleven people living in my house (plus five dogs and a cat). There are people everywhere. My mother-in-law and I are bunking together in my bed. My two front rooms look like a storage unit. Just look at our front living room:
We've actually been doing great! We get tired of each other, and the kids (youngest is 8) are a bit out of sorts not having all their things and having to sleep on the floor, but it's been a family time. We think my sister will close on their purchased home this Thursday, moving the weekend, so we're looking at another week.
My mother-in-law is nearly set up. She's got her utilites and is awaiting the arrival of her furniture on Monday. That place is shaping up, too. In a couple of weeks, she and I will be ready to start for "normalcy." Here she is, getting her kitchen set up:
The turmoil of so many in the house, routine out of sorts, has me sleeping not so well. I fall into bed and asleep but am wide awake by 3 a.m., thinking of the work for the day, how to sneak out of the house so early without interrupting anyone else's night. You can see two rooms here, sleeping bags and mattresses on the floor:
I did sneak out on Thursday morning and was pulling out of my driveway at 4:17 a.m., eager to get to the office and start my busy day. As I rounded a curve on my country road, I saw a possum in the middle of my lane. Too late to swerve, I hit him good. That is sickening enough--the few times I have hit an animal with my car have been most distressing. But it was a whopper of a hit because "something" fluid sprayed all over my hood and windshield. Yuck! At 4:40 a.m. I was sitting in the drive-through "super soak" carwash at the local Shell station, hoping that the carwash could take care of the possum guts.
(note: the possum shown is not the "real" possum--it is for re-enactment purposes only. No possums were harmed in the presentation of this possum-killing illustration)
It was an omen, because it turned into a "possum guts" kind of day. It was later in the morning that I found out that
1) my wayward husband (59) who is shacked up with his 31 year old has a new baby (no fool like an old fool), and
2) That he's monkeying with taxes, and--if he has his way(not going to happen)--I will be left with a big, unexpected tax hickey.
We're working toward divorce (I am NOT going to be stampeded into that to my financial detriment!), but I guess he and she just could not wait until matrimony to reproduce (most likely "she," since it's her third one by a man married to some else--her modus operandi).
I had known for a while now that divorce is inevitable, but this was a pretty hard kick in the teeth--a "possum guts" all over me, if you will. And it was for my son, too, who is grown but still our only child and who had always been the center of the universe. It is surreal to think of my husband of 39 years--all but the last two wonderful--having a whole life without us. Not supposed to be this way...
But, it's going to be okay, I am convinced. My projects with mother-in-law are moving along happily, and I have have this houseful of proof that I have a loving family who support me. I have come to the conclusion that all the confusion of the crowded house is timed perfectly to keep me from spinning into depression at this latest news of my husband's mid-life insanity.
And, I must confess, the darker side of me is actually chuckling a bit inwardly as my mind imagines hubby gearing up to send one through college at nearly 80 years old...sheesh! One never knows...if you think you have life under control, believe me, you are wrong. Reminds me of a quote from one of my favorite books:
...the earth was made round so that we could not see very far down the road.
--Isak Dinesen (Baroness Karen von Blixen), in Out of Africa
Believe me, if I could have seen the curvature of my life coming, I'd have been trying to dodge it. I would avoid all "possum days" if I could.
Probably not the best thing in the broad scheme of things (I'm still working on this philosophy...you know that God has a plan and His is best?)
And, I can't leave without saying that I owe you all a whole 'nother post on the uplifts I got from by blogging friends. Blogging just helps--it reminds me of yet another Isak Dinessen quote:
All sorrows can be borne if you put them into a story or tell a story about them.
While I was stressing out through this time--not even writing--I was receiving unanticipated encouragement from those of you out there in cyberspace. It's a wonderful thing--I'll write about it, of course,watch for it. And the Baroness Blixen was correct: writing this story helps--bless you all. - C