Riding Life!

Riding Life!
Life is like a wild horse--Unless you ride it, it will ride you! (from the movie: "Princess of Thieves.")

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Cowgirl V: Cheers, Goodbye 2011 and My Holiday Newsletter Ramblings

 

Goodbye 2011 bb

So ends 2011.  I don’t want to sound like a pessimist, but I must say that I will not miss 2011! Our family has dealt with some difficult events that were unforeseeable.  Eldest daughter has suffered a complicated pregnancy, a diagnosis of epilepsy, a bacterial blood infection and a blood clot. She endures a painful injection in the abdomen of a blood thinner medication everyday .   My grandchildren had to call 911 one evening when I had left for just an hour.  I have never been so afraid in my life, except when my son broke his neck in an ATV accident a few years back.

 

The Christmas Dinner 2011   Roast Goose

My son cooked the roast goose! 

_MG_0123

  Our son’s fairytale wedding (which I posted about) a couple of years ago, sadly didn’t have a happy ending.  It came to an abrupt end when he discovered she was involved with someone else this summer. Just telling it as it is.  He was devastated and so were we, but he is staying busy and close to family and friends.  He’s going to be fine, but sometimes eldest daughter and I see a deep sadness in his expression.  It’s hard!  Only God knows how much he’s been through and the struggles he’s had in his life.  Makes me almost despair at times, but I still see hope and faith in him and I pray for him everyday.  Really, his whole life is a miracle and an answer to prayer.  Some day I will post what he’s given me permission to write.

 

 

imagesCAI8GBTChristmas newsletter

I love to get Christmas letters from friends and family!  Maybe I’m just nosey, but I like to keep up with people I know.  Most newsletters focus on the accomplishments and vacations, etc.  Kathy,  my neighbor from years ago writes the best newsletters!  She writes about the good and the bad—the accomplishments, the losses—no veneer or glossing over, but truth and hope prevail in her letters.  I hope I  never embarrass anyone or air dirty laundry as a sort of voyeurism, but  I appreciate REAL!  A while back, I told “C” about an especially braggy  newsletter I had received.  “Here’s an example of mine this year if I were to write one”, I said.  Then I recited my imaginary letter with the true real life events of my messed up life and all the stuff my kids had done in their rebellious years.  We laughed our heads off!  Better than crying!

 

Family photo 1977

The way we were around 1978.  Has it been that long?


I’ve been cleaning my house like a maniac and I came across a family photo with our firstborn.  I realized how much I’ve (we’ve) changed and yes, aged over the years.  When “C” and were visiting my sister and mom last month, my sister asked us “Do you ever pass by a mirror, and catch a glance and think “Is that ME?  Is that REALLY me?”  We both had to confess:  Yes, we have!  I hate to admit to vanity, but I’d be less than honest if I denied it.  I don’t spend a lot of time on myself, but maybe I SHOULD try a little harder!  I just submitted a recent photo to Karen’s blog (one of my favorite places to visit) at www.thisoldhousetoo.blogspot.com.  It was a little scary, because as I told her, I usually duck or run when I see someone coming with a camera.  Especially, my hubby because he has a knack for catching me in the most unflattering poses—such as mid-chew during dinner or eyes half closed!  He let me know tonight that he does not like the blond highlights I’ve added.  The brunette of my youth seems too harsh, but the blond seems to wash me out.  “Maybe, I should just go with the gray”, I said.  I’ve earned every single gray hair over the past 20 years! Ummm, they say that about wrinkles too, don’t they?  Just don’t want to be the pathetic aging woman trying too hard to hang on to lost youth.  There’s a certain dignity in getting older, isn’t there?  Or there should be!  I suppose this angst over aging is fairly common to most babyboomer women, but I would really like to come to peace with it this year.  I  was in a state of disbelief when I first became a grandmother at age 45, but I’ve come to terms with it—yes, I’ve even embraced it as they say.  I dearly love my grandchildren, but it was a shock to become a grandmother when I still had a 12 year old at home!  Just sayin.

 

Family photo 2009

The way we were in 2006.  My hair was still dark!  I may have had a little help!

So my New Year’s resolution this year is self acceptance.  I can’t tell you how difficult that is for me!  To publish a recent photo, is just a little excruciating,  but I’ll get over it!  It may sound strange, but it’s something I need to get over!  On her birthday (June 24), Dulcy Stewart’s post on turning sixty at www.dulcysdoorstep.blogspot.com, inspired me to consider that there are indeed worse things in life than turning sixty!  Of course, not everyone ages as gracefully as Dulcy, but one can hope! I love her longish silver hair and sense of style.  She is also an amazing artist!

After tucking grandchild into bed, we read one of our very favorites- The Napping House.   As we lay there , we watched the fireworks display from the neighbor across the road from the upstairs window.  A sweet, quiet way to see the year end.   Hubby retired early due to a viral infection he’s having difficulty kicking.  I forgot to buy the customary champagne when we were out today, so there will not be a New Year’s toast.  We’ll celebrate the New Year tomorrow evening with Cowgirl C.  She’s cooking short ribs and gouda grits and she keeps telling me about this new salad recipe with fresh brussel sprouts and I know she will have wine!  I can’t wait! We’ll have to eat some black eyed peas so we’ll have good luck in the coming year!  Hope we will post more at Stick Horse Cowgirls this coming year!  Life just presses in sometimes and gets in the way of what I want to do.  So peace, hope, and joy to all out there in the blogging neighborhood—blessings to you all in the coming year.  Happy New Year!

16 comments:

Vee said...

Oh I so enjoyed reading this even though you were real and shared some pressing concerns and even though you made me jump hoops. I'm not surprised with that one from a Stick Horse Cowgirl, though. So, the short of it is that you made me cry and I enjoyed that? I'm certifiable. ☺

Do keep us informed with your daughter's progress. When is the new baby due? She's a courageous gal for keeping on keeping on.

And I'm so sorry about your son's marriage. Been there. Done that. Know that it can wipe one out, though I hope with all my heart that he'll move through it much more quickly than I did. It's a choice and I pray that he makes the wise one in this. She's gone. Time to move on. Praying him through is a wise choice for you.

And I much enjoyed all the conversation about hair, growing older, doing more, requiring more, not recognizing oneself in the mirror. And I'll continue to read whatever you wish to post on those issues!

Off to follow that final link.

A bright and beautiful New Year to both you and that other Stick Horse Cowgirl!

TexWisGirl said...

a good dose of honesty, reality, acceptance to us all! :)

jan said...

Your post inspired me to 'de-lurk' and comment about the aging/ hair, thing. A couple of years ago, I decided that the fake color was not making me look younger, and I grew out my grey hair. I get more compliments on the color of my hair now, than I ever did before. It is hard to see the outside of ourselves, when, on the inside we still 'see' ourselves as 18 or so. It is good to feel authentic, though!

I hope 2012 is a better one for your family and for us all!

Karen said...

Happy New Year, V - I loved this post! Praying for all to have good health and good resolutions this year -

Happyone:-) said...

I pray that this year will be a good one for you and your family.
I enjoyed reading your post.

Zuzana said...

Oh, what a lovely candid post! I loved every line, and I am truly sorry to hear about your daughter and sons misfortunes... 2011 was unkind to me too, but then it also gave back as much as it took, leaving me incredibly happy. I wish such happiness will return to your son too.
I also loved seeing all those images, what a gorgeous women you were - and still are.;) And I feel the same about passing a mirror too.;)
Finally, I would like to wish you a Happy New Year, may 2012 be a prosperous one for you and yours.;)
xoxo

Thistle Cove Farm said...

I'm with you, not missing 2011 at all although I do miss my husband who died in Nov. Just stinks and every day is a struggle.

Sandra said...

Thank God life is full of new beginnings. May 2012 be a wonderful, healthy, happy year for both you and C and your families.

Sandra said...

Thank God life is full of new beginnings. May 2012 be a wonderful, healthy, happy year for both you and C and your families.

Stevie said...

Hope you enjoyed your brussel sprouts! They are delicious this time of year and we had them for New Year's, too. I can't imagine why I would ever color my hair. The white strands count as "highlighting" as far as I'm concerned. :)
Stevie @ ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com

Anonymous said...

Dee from Tennessee

...I am waaaaaaaay older than you gals and if I could afford it ....I would go get my hairlighted every month - not because of the gray but because it always looks dirty. I am what one politely refers to as "unphotographic".....ugh. What is REALLY REALLy bad.....is that I am buying -- and I'm NOT a clothes shopper is the irony -- every lil top that I can see that reminds me of my yrs at college DECADES, DECADES, DECADES, DECADES ago....deciding to wear those in addition to the tee shirts that I've only worn since retiring. Not embracing my senior status at all/has been very difficult transition for me/very isolated (and as they say, "if that's all I ever have to complain about I will have had a very good life" which I have/God has blessed me, blessed me, blessed me -- learning to stand on His promises!!....but I LOVED your post. Haven't read the other comments yet- y'all have the best comments! "Be of good cheer" to all!

kath001 said...

Playing catch up on blog reading. Wanted to say Happy New Year and wish you and C a year full of blessings.

Debbie said...

V, whew! God bless you and your family. Praying God's blessings to you in this new year. I 100% relate to the hair thing; I've been coloring for 20 years and can't bring myself to let the natural color reveal itself. My reasoning was that I didn't want my children to remember me as their gray-haired mom in their youths (I am an older mom with four of five children born in my 30's). Now, Rick is the one who likes my blonde hair; it was dark like yours many years ago. Oh well. It certainly won't matter in eternity.
Wishing you great things in 2012!

Debbie said...

V, whew! God bless you and your family. Praying God's blessings to you in this new year. I 100% relate to the hair thing; I've been coloring for 20 years and can't bring myself to let the natural color reveal itself. My reasoning was that I didn't want my children to remember me as their gray-haired mom in their youths (I am an older mom with four of five children born in my 30's). Now, Rick is the one who likes my blonde hair; it was dark like yours many years ago. Oh well. It certainly won't matter in eternity.
Wishing you great things in 2012!

Anonymous said...

to paraphrase jimmy buffet - wrinkles are where the laugh lines used to be :) i think grey hair is the same kind of thing - a marker of a life both "lived" and experieced in it's depth which does include the bad and the good.

i hope 2012 is more gentle to you and yours than 2011 was.

Anonymous said...

If your going to discuss other people's lives on here, you might want to get your shit straight first.

Thanks!

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